True Colors ~Chapter Three~ Gimme Sympathy

Let's just say... my childhood wasn't the greatest.

Sure, in my little home in the suberbs of Riverview, I had the perfect "Southern Family"- or at least that was the impression we gave off to the public.

There was my father Dustin, a hardworking businessman, and my mother Leanne, one of those typical blonde, southern bell stay-at-home mothers.

But, as you've heard before, never judge a book by its cover.

Behind that big oak door, you could see that the perfect little family we had was really broken and shattered- broken and shattered by none other that my father.

My sister Delilah was the only one that I was really close with growing up. She was the only one who understood what I was going through, and she was obviously going through similar circumstances.

In my childhood years, I was always the tough one. The one that everyone stepped to the side in order not to cross in my path.

In my teenage years, I was what you could call the heartbreaker- the one guy all the girls wanted, and then deeply regretted having anything to do with me.

My actions were looked down upon by everyone- except in my father's eyes.

In his eyes, everything I did was "typical behavior". He even credited himself for my behavior, saying that he had "shaped the boy right". And honestly, he had.

From a young age, I had been purely brainwashed by my father's Words of Wisdom.

"Son, lemme tell you something."

"Yes Dad?" I replied.

"Someday, Carty, you're gonna meet a girl, and yur gonna wanna marry that girl."

"I know."

"When you marry her, you need to show her who's boss. You know, show her she needs to treat you with her respect. Whatcha do, son, is ya reel her in, then show her the ropes."

"What do you mean, Dad?"

I watched a sly grin form on his face. "Ya know what I mean, Carty. Just what I do to your mom. A little whack here and there, and pretty soon you'll have that girl shaped up in no time."

I took these words in. "But... Won't that make her scared of me?"

He gave me a thoughful look, before grinning again. "Nah, 'course not! Women these days need to learn to quite bein' goddamn mouthy bitches to their men. They need to know there place, cuz women aren't nothin' without their men."

"I... I understand."

He looked at me with his arms crossed at his chest. "Do ya now?"

A smile went across my face. "I do. Dad, I wanna be just like you when I grow up."

He grinned and ruffled my hair with his hand. "That a boy, Carty."

In my mind, my dad's word was the truth. Everything that was uttered from his mouth was meant to be taken honestly and seriously, and to be believed.

When I met that one girl, the one that was right for me in that club in Bridgeport, I made sure to follow my father's rules.

Selena Night, a beautiful, feisty girl who I absolutely loved.

I did as I was told-

I reeled her in...

Then, after a final bout of her venomous tongue getting the best of her,

I "showed her the ropes".

I showed her that Carter Mason took absolutely no shit, and was to be respected by his woman.

I simply walked away, leaving her helpless on the ground after my hand went across her face.

In my mind, she was to respect me, do as she was told and not refuse, and try her best not to piss me off.

I loved her, but bondaries had to be set, didn't they?

As I stood over her broken body, I fully realised that I was a monster.

As a second generation, Selena was my mother.

And I-I was a unfortunate copy of my asshole father.

True Colors-Chapter 2 ~Sad Sad City~

It was the morning after the battle I had had with Carter in the kitchen.

I still ached all over, but I still managed to get myself up and make breakfast.

The sound of footsteps coming down the steps make me shiver in fear. He was up early.

"Good Morning." I said in a stiff tone as he entered the kitchen.

"Morning." He replied.

There was a short silence before I suddenly felt two arms wrap around my waist.

It caught me off guard, making me gasp in suprise and nearly drop the milk in my hand.

"Mhmm..." I heard him sigh. "Whatcha making?"

"W-Waffles..." 

He kept his arms around me as I finished up the batter, actually giving me some sense of security; some sense of trust. Of course, I knew better than to find myself putting any form of trust in him again, because the minute I did so, he'd find a way to show me why I shouldn't.

I sort of shimmied my way out of his grip and headed over to the oven, him following behind.

Cautiously and quickly-with him behind me-I stuffed the waffles into the oven. He had pressed me against a oven last night, who says he wouldn't shove me face forward into one too?

I turned around to face him. I didn't know what to say. Was he leading me on? Was he still mad at me?

"You... You don't have your hair greased back."

"Nah, it looks stupid like that anyways. Besides, you like it this way anyways, right?"

I slowly nodded. When had he ever given one thought to my opinion? What I liked?

He then abruptly pulled me into an embrace, catching me off gaurd once more.

"Selly, I'm sorry about last night." I didn't say anything in response, but he continued on. "I do love you. Its just... I don't know. Some of the other guys at work think your adorable, and they talk about you all the time. I just irrationally thought that you were cheating on me with one of them."

I stayed silent. Why the hell did I even fall in love with this irrational bastard?! His colleagues thought I was "adorable", so that automatically meant that I was, for a lack of better words, fucking with them? Tears were forming in my eyes.

"Do you still love me, Selly?"

"Y-Yes..." I stuttered out, even though I was blatently lying. Although, I could've easily been telling the truth. I couldn't even tell.

There was a silence before he decided to speak again.

"Your face..." He said in a guilty tone.

"Its... fine, Carter."

"No, its not. Hows... your back?"

"Its okay, I guess."

"I am sorry."

"You've never been sorry before, nor have you ever cared about my battle wounds! Why all the sudden hava a change of heart?" I instantly regretted saying that and winced, fearing how he would react.

Instead, his facial expression softened, and he looked at me with a pitiful look on his face.

"I think it's getting worse, Selena. I feel as though that neither I or the meds can control as well I used to be able to..."

When had he ever been able to control it that well?

He then pulled me closer. "Look, I took the day off. How about we... you know..."

Before I could respond, he crushed his lips against mine.

Stupidly, I allowed him to do so, and part of me actually was enjoying it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

He was always the more dominate one, the one always on top.

This was wrong. This wasn't him making up to me, but rather his plot of "makeup sex" that would somehow in his mind make everything magically better, but also fulfill his needs.

I myself was so desperate for any form of love and compassion, that I just wanted to ignore his reasons.

But this couldn't go unoticed.

Roughly, I pushed him off, causing him to growl in disapproval.

"What the hell, Selena?"

"I-I'm not gonna have make up sex with you."

Slowly, I sat up and sighed.

"It's not going to make our fucked up relationship magically have a quick healing. Its not going to make all the wounds and hurt just dissappear."

There was no response from him, but I heard him stand up and walk over. He positioned himself in front of me, his arms crossed at his chest.

"We're doing it, Selena. I know you want it."

I stayed silent. He continued on.

"All you do is keep things from me. This will not be one of them."

I bit my lip, anger filling inside me. "So your gonna force me to fuck you?! How the HELL do I know that your not just some horny bastard wanting to get some like you were a year ago in the freaking bar? Trying to take advantage of some blonde college girl that was drunk off her ass?"

"Why you little-"

Instantly, I screeched, pushing off the bed and past him, and ran for the stairs, cursing my venomous tongue.

"Selena!" he bellowed, chasing after me.

I was in front of the steps now, started by his bellowing.

I turned around, only to feel the force of his strong hand push me backwards.

I screeched out in suprise, and felt myself fall downward.

Finally, hitting the floor and landing on my stomach, I cried out in pain.

Everything in my body felt broken. Everything ached.

I heard the sound of footsteps start down the stairs, and come to me.

The bastard stood over me, examining what he had done.

I  began sobbing. I felt like I couldn't move.

"Oh God." He groaned. "Suck it up, Selena. You deserved it."

"C-Carter..." I gasped out.

There was a brief silence, before I heard him groan in annoyance one again and head back the stairs, slamming the bedroom door.

   

 

True Colors- Chapter 1 ~Broken Dreams~

I was pretty once.

 I was Selena Night, a bubbly, 18 year old college girl who was high on life, and a little but low on common sense.

I was the party girl; the girl who was all about parties, friends, and love. School was worked in somewhere in that mix, I'm sure of it.

Me and my best friend Mara were always hitting the clubs on any typical night. A small secluded dance club called The Grind seemed to be our own particular hotspot.

Whenever we went, we seemed to do the same things;

Order some badly named drinks, spot out some cuties, and dance, dance, dance.

Of course, I usually ended up getting drunk enough and have my own little dance party on one of the club's bar tables.

Usually, it ended up attracting at least one guy wanting to get some, and tonight was no different.

A guy walked up to the table and grinned, taking a sip of his drink.

I grinned back, and started swaying my hips a little more.

"Should I throw some dollar bills or something?" He joked, taking another drink.

"Nah." I said, leaping off the table.

"But I'm sure you wouldn't mind a lil' dance with me, now would ya?" I winked at the end.

He set down his drink and smiled. "Sounds good."

I laughed and dragged him to the dance floor.

 Of course, a dance floor plus my drunken manners made our innocent dance something more, and our dance made The Grind live up to its name.

He pulled me closer, and our hips swayed together to the upbeat song that was coming from the wall speakers.

As the song came to an end, me and him sure didn't.

The two of us stared in to each others eyes for a moment, before the burning temptation of us both kicked in, and our lips crushed together.

The guy from the club, who I would later learn was named Carter Mason, would soon become my boyfriend, and I would be irrepressibly in love with him. I would not be able to be happy without him at my side.

In a span of three months, the guy from the club -Carter Mason- would become my husband, making me the happiest girl in the world.

I would drop out of college to be a cute little housewife, sporting an adorable little apron to make Carter laugh.

I was his wife; he was my husband. I planned to be there for him and be there to pick him up if he would fall.

Of course, when his hand went across my face, and I fell, I expected him to pick me up, caress me in kisses, and apologize for a horrible flaw in the management of his anger.

I expected to much.

Instead, he simply walked away as if nothing had happened, abandoning me on the floor.

I was alone, sitting on the cold tile flooring of my kitchen. Our kitchen. In the home I shared with someone I thought that loved me. I honestly felt like a puppy, one that was dumped off at a shelter- the owners not wanting to deal with it anymore.

My dreams were broken- along with my heart.

Prologue

It had been typical day. As a stupid housewife, I had almost completed my daily regimen, and was cooking getting ready to cook dinner for my not so new husband, Carter. The two of us had been married for only a year, but it had felt like eternity. We were so young- him 24 and myself a young, 20 year old girl. Everyday, I regretted hopping into marriage with a boy I had only known for 3 months- not to mention a boy 4 years older. Age didn't matter to me. The "love" was all that seemed to be the important role.

I heard the front door slam open, and instantly feared the worst. Oh no. He was mad about something.

I retraced my steps in my head as I cowered to the corner of the countertops, scanning my mind of previous actions of mine for anything that could've potentially pissed him off.

"Selena!" He yelled, causing me to cringe. I heard his footsteps trail into the kitchen, and he stood in front of me, taking in my cowardly posistion.

"Get the hell up." He ordered. Not wanting to piss him off anymore than he was, I instantly obeyed, and went to him.

"W-What's w-wron-" Unfortunately, I was unable to finish my sentence,and instead was flung to the other side of the kitchen.

He leaned himself on the counter, obviously preparing himself for my beating. "Some guys at work said you were cheating on me. I thought you loved me, you whore."

"Wha-" I hadn't cheated on him! Sure, I'd hugged a few of his fellow collegues at office parties, but they were just innocent friendly hugs nothing more. "I didn't cheat, Carter! I would never do something like that to you!"

Before I knew it, he had me by the waist, and pushed me up against the oven and into the stovetop, which unfortunately had been warming up in preperation for dinner.

I screamed out in pain, as I felt the heat through my thin shirt. "Son of a bitch!" I gasped out, instantly regretting it.

He realeased me from between him and the stove, and threw me to the side. I rested my head on the cabinets, my singed back aching horribly. "P-Please... Please stop..."

"You skank. You filthy slut."

I found the strength to stand up and stick my hand out.

"Stop this, Carter! I... love you! I would never have another man!" All of this was was semi-lies, but you do what you have to do.

Of course, the pompous man refused to listened, and only pushed me aside, and I landed back where I had originally cowered. I leaned my head again the counter and put a hand on my back, trying to soothe my burns.

I collapsed in the corner, letting out small sobs. "C-C-Carter..."

He walked over and looked down at me, anger still in his eyes.

"Look at you, you little pathetic whore. What did I ever see in you?"

"I-I-I-I l-love y-you..."

"Go die, Selena."

He walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, where I heard his footsteps travels up the oak staircase.

I let out violent sobs.

Carter Mason. My once true love.

I shouldn't have hopped into a marriage with him. It was simply the general stupidity of youth, and being blind with love that controlled me.

But being aware now and no longer blind, I found myself facing His True Colors.